A Servant's Heart

Growing up in a church, I recall frequently hearing the phrase "a servant's heart."  Honestly, I never quite understood what the preacher meant when he put an emphasis on having a servant's heart.  In fact, it was not until I began reading Lady In Waiting that this whole notion came in perspective for me.


Philippians 2:3-5 says:
     "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus."


On the surface, having the heart of a servant seems to be a simple enough concept; however, after reading more into the subject, I realized it is much more complex than I initially thought.  Having a servant's heart encompasses more than doing work for others.  Having a servant's heart focuses not just on the actions you perform, but also on your attitude while performing them.


It was the last part of that which threw me for a loop.  I always thought that as long as I was doing actions as a service for others, I was doing good in the eyes of the Lord.  I love doing for others, but I quickly realized that my intentions were not always the best.  In too many situations, I had ulterior motives for my actions.


My underlying intentions often led to disappointment and heartache.  God intends for us to have a servant's  heart when giving to others so that we can avoid this type of disappointment and heartache.  A servant's heart means your intentions are completely pure.  You do not expect anything in return --> not even secretly, not even a little bit.


While reading Lady in Waiting, I realized what a big problem pure intentions were in general, but especially for women.  Women have the natural tendency to assume the role of caregiver.  I, personally, assume the role of caregiver easily and often.  Anyone that knows me would attest to this fact.  In the past, I have played the caregiver, or mother, role with the intentions of winning the attention and affections of a male.


Let's face it, ladies, guys usually do not look past the face value of an action!  While they may seem appreciative or thankful, their gratitude should not be mistaken for affection or a sign of their undying love.  A female allowing herself to misinterpret a man's gratitude can set her up for disaster.  In the same way, however, a man may misinterpret the friendship of a woman and this could ultimately lead to heartbreak for him.


Having pure intentions are part of having a servant's heart.  Having pure intentions safeguards your heart.  As one step in the right direction toward having a servant's heart, I have begun praying about my actions, even if it is an action as simple as sending a text message.  I just need assurance that both the recipient, and I understand the context of the situation and/ or of the communication.  I have seen that performing an action with a servant's heart makes you closer to the greatest prize of all- the heart of God. 

From Heartbreak to Healing

Everyday, everywhere millions of people experience some type of heartbreak.  It could be as simple as making a bad grade in school.  It could be as complex as losing a loved one.  With every heartbreak comes a new set of possibly life-changing circumstances.

In my life, I have experienced heartbreak in many forms on many separate occasions.  For a long time, I looked for comfort in worldly activities.   For nine years, I experienced reoccurring heartbreak.  The death of my dad forever changed my young life.  I held numerous positions in school organizations and community activities that gave me ample opportunity to be a positive leader and great Christian influence.  I severely neglected the opportunities I was given.

I believed that the deck of cards life dealt me simply was not fair, and I could do basically whatever I wanted to.  That mentality did not bring joy and happiness.  That mentality brought pain and sorrow.  Instead of being a positive influence on those around me during high school, I displayed a mediocre attitude.  While I did not necessarily encourage others to partake in negative, sinful activities, I did not witness or lead by faith.

When I left for college, I was given a new territory for witnessing.  Once again, God threw me a curveball.  At the beginning of my sophomore year at Auburn, I lost my boyfriend, my best friend.  I dealt with the pain and guilt of Tylor’s death for a long time.  In fact, until very recently, I do not think I properly grieved.  I avoided it, seeking a refuge in all of my school activities and worldly activities.

Over the course of the past nine years, I have continuously been told that I was strong.  I did stand strong, but it was not strong on the rock of my faith.  I stood strong by dealing with my issues in my own way.  My method of dealing with issues often caused confrontations between those that I love the most and myself.  My method of dealing with issues (avoidance) caused me to be incapable of maintaining a functional dating relationship.

I came to the realization that without some major change, I did not know what direction to take in life.  A very wise friend reminded me that nothing on this earth would be able to feel the emptiness I felt in my heart, that void could be filled with the love of Jesus alone.  That friend had faith in me.  More importantly, I trusted him, because his unwavering faith is evident in his everyday life.

For the past nine years, I have struggled to hang onto my sanity during the month of August.  This year, I am ready to conquer August.  I am ready to face the heartbreak of my past with the promise of my future.  I am ready to make a significant change in my life.  I continue to work through my heartbreaks, but this time, I will face them with the everlasting love of God in my heart and with His strong arms wrapped around me.  

The Highlights and Lowlights of the SEC

Wow!  Can you believe that the regular college football season is over?  It seems like just yesterday it was the first weekend in September, and we were looking forward to another exciting football season... especially in the Southeastern Conference.  I will be the first one to admit- if you would have told me what this season held, I would have never believed you.  Auburn University, playing for a BCS National Championship?  Cam Newton, leading contender for the Heisman trophy?  Yeah, right.

So, with all the craziness of football season, I would like to commemorate the end of football season with my season highlights.  This year, it was truly anything on any day in the SEC!  Warning- these highlights may appear to be lowlights for fans of certain other higher educational institutions.


10.  Les Miles, the "Mad Hatter," has continued success.  OK, he is the "Mad Hatter," so no one is really shocked by that.  Anaylsts have always said that it takes a certain amount of luck paired with ability to be a truly successful program.  Regardless of the amount of talent on the team, Miles always has luck on his side.

9.  Alshon Jeffrey.  I believe the former rotten apple of the SEC, Lane Kiffin, was quoted as saying something along the lines of-  "If Alshon Jeffrey goes to South Carolina, he will end up pumping gas for a living."  Once again, Lane Kiffin was so wrong.  In my opinion, Jeffrey is the best receiver in the league.  At 6'4", he will lead the Gamecocks in another successful season next year.

8.  Mark Ingram was named Second Team All-SEC.  In the most powerful league in the country, that is not too shabby.  Oh wait, he won the Heisman last year.  Second Team is a little disappointing for the 2009 Heisman winner.

7.  Urban Meyer retires, part two.  Today, Urban Meyer announced that he would retire from one of the most prestigious jobs in college football- head coach at the University of Florida.  Really, is he old enough to retire?  I read a tweet that said if JoePa had retired at Meyer's age, it would have been about 1972.  That would be about right.  Tomorrow will tell if Meyer is serious this go round.

6.  The SEC East.  The SEC East had a surprising lack of talent and success this season.  Better luck next year.

5.  Nick Fairley.  Seriously.  I do not think there is a quarterback in the conference that does not have nightmares about #90.  Fairley, like Newton, was not named to the preseason All-SEC team.  That is ok.  I am sure as he accepted the Lombardi Award for best lineman in the country tonight, that was not on his mind.  Just as Newton served as the catalyst for the Auburn offense, Fairley served as the catalyst for the Auburn defense.  His athleticism and ability has been compared to the likes of Tracy Rocker, who ironically serves as Fairley's position coach.

4.  South Carolina.  Hello America.  They made their first appearance in the SEC Championship game in school history.  Do not be surprised if they are back next year.  Regardless of the margin of loss in the SEC Championship game this year, they are undoubtedly the best team in the SEC East.  With all of their returning players and Spurrier as coach, look for them to be a major contender for the SEC title next year.

3.  Alabama lost three games.  Count them- South Carolina, LSU, Auburn.  Who would have thought, the defending National Champion would end their season as the "best three-loss team" in the country.

2.  The entire football season centered around Cam Newton.  Ridiculous.  It is not fair to every other player in the sport.  In this case, it was not fair to the player himself.  With every day came a new story.  You never knew what was going to appear on the news.  The most highly-respected sports commentators admitted that they had never seen a case that evan began to compare to Cameron Newton's case.  On one hand, legitimate allegations were being made; yet, there was a startling lack of material evidence.  Thayer Evans spearheaded an all-out smear campaign against the best player in college football.  Cam Newton will accept his Heisman in New York City Saturday night, and his greatness will forever be ingrained in the history books.

1.  War Damn Eagle.  That is right, my team, with our highly praised and equally criticized quarterback, is Glendale, Arizona bound.  Never, in my wildest dreams, would I have even considered a national championship game as a possibility.  The Auburn family has been blessed with an amazing season, unparalleled by any before it.  On January 8th, I will be boarding an airplane headed to Arizona.  Let's hope Auburn can bring home the fifth consecutive BCS National Championship to the SEC!  Five in a row- that is dominance if I have ever seen it!

Well guys, it has been an amazing season.  The best part is yet to come- let's bring home another Championship!  War Damn Eagle!

A Greater Purpose

So, we all know that I love to write crazy, to the point blogs.  Today's is a little bit different- it's an advertisement of sorts.  When you click on my blog, you never know what might be that day's topic.  Usually, you can bet on it being a list of rules or something to do with football.  Well, my friend Andrew has started his own blog.  This blog, has a higher purpose.  


Andrew is currently a student at The Baptist College of Florida.  The focus of his blog is to discuss my #1 man- JESUS!  Andrew wants to use his blog to talk about everything in life, with a lot of focus on Christianity.  I personally love reading blogs, and I don't think anyone could pick a better focus.  


God's Word provides a shelter in times of trouble, answers for the curious, and directions for everyday life. As yall know, I have been trying to decide what path to take with my life.  I have a lot of questions, but more than questions, I have faith.  I trust God to lead me down the right path, being the path He wants for my life.  The following song lyrics basically describe my life right now:

In Christ Alone

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless Babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save

'Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live, I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again

And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From a life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny

No power of hell, no scheme of man
Could ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I stand

I will stand, I will stand
All other ground is sinking sand
All other ground, all other ground
Is sinking sand, is sinking sand
So I stand

I want to use this blog to remind everyone that when you face uncertainties in life or you are having a bad day, please remember, God is always on your side.  He has a plan for your life.  Andrew's blog can give you a little Jesus if you need it.  He just wants to use his blog as a place to express his opinions and beliefs, and maybe, even if it is just one person, will come to know more about Jesus through his writing.  When you get a minute, visit Andrew's blog- it's God's love and heart for others at work.  

akornegay.blogspot.com 

You saw WHAT on Facebook?!?

It has been entirely too long since my last blog.  With my abundance of time, I should be blogging- honestly, what else do I have to do?  I had to pick a super appealing topic for my grand reentrance into the world of "A Small Town Southern Girl" blog.  Blogs concerning Facebook have drawn a lot of attention and comments in the past, so I decided to revisit the topic.  This time, I solicited other people's opinions, and with the great commentary I received, it won't be the last time.  This blog once again hits on people's various pet peeves on Facebook.

1.  The whole idea of what I would like to label "Facebook Displays of Affection."  Simply put, please don't.  I can not tell you how many comments I got regarding this issue.  One rule will not even begin to touch every area of Facebook Displays of Affection; it requires subpoints.
          1A.  No mushy, gushy stuff on each other's walls or on your own statues.  Facebook has two phenomenal options to best serve individuals wishing to express their innermost romantic feelings for one another- Facebook messages and Facebook chat.  Both provide more private options.  They save you the embarrassment and everyone else the gagging.
          1B.  I have mentioned this once before.  However, two people mentioned this, so I decided to emphasize it one more time.  If you are not married or engaged, your Facebook status should not say so. If you are not married, you probably should not refer to your significant other has husband or wife- it's, well, stupid.
          1C.  If you and your significant other both have Facebook,  it is not necessary to write on each other's wall everyday.  That is overkill and unnecessary.
          1D.  I believe the ultimate Facebook relationship ridiculous award should be given to anyone that creates a fake Facebook for their significant other.  You have too much time on your hands, and you have serious trust issues.

2.  Relationship statues present an interesting dynamic for a couple.  A lot of people believe that if it's not on Facebook, it is not official!  I, along with many of my friends, believe that "it's complicated" should never be your relationship status.  If your relationship is that complicated, don't kid yourself- it's only a matter of time until you are single.  Also, if one of your friends goes from being "in a relationship" to "single"- you probably should not like it, that's RUDE!

3.  Facebook statuses always cause discussion.  This issue, too, requires multiple subpoints.
          3A.  Do not put every move you make on your status.  No one cares.
          3B.  Do not put what you eat for supper on your status.  That's creepy.
          3C.  Do not update your status every five minutes.  As Clair says, "Take that "ish" to Twitter!"
          3D.  Do not use extremely obscene language on your status.  Young children and people's grandmas may frequent your page.  You don't want to offend them!  Things such as War Damn Eagle are acceptable.  Using words more extreme, probably not acceptable.
          3E.  On that note, do not put up a status one day using the "f" word and one the next day featuring  a Bible verse.  I love people that love Jesus, but I do not love extreme hypocrisy.
          3F.  Do not flip flop between statuses about extreme party habits and your child or children.  This does not get you nominated for Parent of the Year.
          3G.  I understand the "I like it on..." statuses.  This is to promote breast cancer awareness.  If used appropriately, it serves the purpose; however, as always, some people have to make it vulgar and perverted.  Why must you certain people ruin a good thing?

4.  Facebook photos- best way to stalk people ever; requires subpoints.
          4A.  Please do not put trashy pictures online.  If you put trashy pictures online, I hope you get trashy messages.  Regardless of what your friends or baby daddy says, there is such a thing as too much cleavage or too short of a skirt.
          4B.  Also, a pregnancy test is a stick that you tinkle on- it's awesome when it says you are pregnant, but the whole world does not need to see it.
          4C.  If you have pictures of other people's children on your page, post respectfully.  You should not have more pictures than they do.
          4D.  Speaking of children- if you are having a wild party and your child is also present, please do not document this.  Albums featuring beer, cigarettes, and babies scream DHR!
          4E.  Do not set your profile picture to you and another girl if you are in a serious relationship.  Why would anyone even do this?  Apparently someone has in the past.

5.  If you are in a relationship, you should not continually send friend request to random members of the opposite sex.  That's looking for trouble.

6.  I know you might like to Farm or play with your Mafia, but most of us do not care about it at all.  If you consume your time with this type of activity, I am willing to search for you a new hobby.

7.  When you are posting information on Facebook, regardless of what form it is in, tread carefully when it comes to information about other people.  This person might be more private and offended if their business becomes public to the Facebook world.

8.  Do not put your emotional meltdowns on Facebook.  That is your personal business, and although it might feel right at the time, you will probably regret it later.

9.  Keep your family feuds off Facebook.  You have messaging or a telephone for this- other people really do not care about your personal disagreements.

10.  As always, check that grammar and spelling!

I know I have covered a lot of these issues before, but some people just need a refresher!  Remember, I am looking out for everyone's best interest.  Potential employers look at Facebook- what type of impression do you want them to have?  My friends and I look at your Facebook, and we are not really big fans of dramatic and flat out crazy.

Fanatic Fan Fundamentals

So, it is without a doubt, my favorite time of the year- FOOTBALL SEASON!  Everyday when I get on Facebook, I am reminded of some fans unbecoming behavior.  I am not pointing fingers at any specific team, because I know better than that.  Every team has fans that give their school a bad name.  In my neck of the woods, some schools have more of these rather obnoxious fans than others.  I want to help everyone out and provide a few rules that would make football season a lot smoother for fans of all schools.

1.  Show a little respect.  Think before you speak (or type).  Carefully consider, is your opinion really necessary?
2.  Stay positive.  Nothing bothers me more than when opposing fans write negative comments on what should be a positive status.
3.  You worry about your team,  I will worry about mine!  It is no secret that I bleed orange and blue.  My statuses concerning football are usually about either Auburn or Troy.  If my statuses are about other teams, they are not negative.  (OK, I can think of a couple of times that I kind of pushed it a little)  I get extremely tired of fans from rival schools posting trashy statuses about my team or any other team.  I am glad they are so concerned, but they can take that concern somewhere else.
4.  Focus on this century!  It is phenomenal that your team has won one trillion national championships in the past, but can we focus on the fact that they have won one since you were born.  This probably sounds like I am talking about one school specifically, and I am in that sense.  I am also talking about any other school that enjoys harping on past accomplishments.  I like living in the future and focusing on the team that is on the field.
5.  I always find that the worst fans are those that never attended the school and couldn't find the university if their life depended upon it.  If you are one of these people, sit down.  Please do not make your respective university look bad.
6.  If you do attend the university, then you should be educated enough to act appropriately.  You are the ones that are drag your school's name through the mud because of your inability to hold your tongue (or fingers).  I have great respect for other institutions and their athletic departments, I know not everyone feels the same way.  Having attended Auburn, I take pride in supporting my alma mater and being gracious and welcoming to visiting fans on game day and rivals on any day.
7.  On week one, please do not make your national championship predictions.  That is, well, annoying.  Anything can happen on any week in college football- SEC fans, you should know this best!
8.  When your team wins by 6 touchdowns, I do not need to hear about it all week.  I, for one, enjoy competitive football.  Competitive football entails two teams of equal talent fighting for a win.  Scores resembling 41-31 or 17-14 mean it was a good game, a score of 60-3 does not.  That simply means you won by a landslide, be the bigger person and be a little humble.
9.  If you attend one university, do not disrespect them by wearing opposing team's gear on game day at home.  That is ridiculous.  It does not make sense.  In my opinion, if you go to Auburn, and it's game day in Auburn, if you can't find your burnt orange and navy blue, you better just stay at home.
10.  I have not named any schools specifically in this blog, but in light of my team affiliation, I will use my last rule to name names.  I believe in Auburn and love it.  If you don't believe in Auburn and love it, don't tell me that on my status.  If you are wearing crimson and white and your status says Roll Tide, I won't be committing on it in a negative way.  The Auburn, Alabama rivalry runs deep in our state.  Some Alabama fans (and sadly some Auburn fans) just can not manage to keep their mouths shut throughout the season.  It literally makes my blood boil.  The Iron Bowl is two months away, don't hate on my team now.

I had the privilege of attending the school I cheer for every Saturday.  My university gave me a unique opportunity- the opportunity to forever call myself a member of the Auburn family.  The spirit of the Auburn family is not something that can be understood by everyone.  In fact, I grew up an Auburn fan, but I did not truly grasp the meaning of the "Auburn family" until I attended Auburn.  I am proud to forever call myself a member of this family.  Wherever I go in life, I will look forward to returning to the Plains and the unique War Eagle moments I might encounter.

I hope everyone is enjoying football season, but remember... keep your "fanatic fan" under control!

War Eagle!

My Hero is a Marine

"Freedom is not free, but the Marine Corps will pay most of your share."

- Ned Dolan

     Growing up, I lived in a small town that lacked much military activity.  The closest base was 45 minutes away- a man or women in uniform was not commonplace.  On September 11, 2001, the entire dynamic of our nation was changed.  We were a nation that had not seen serious, prolonged combat action since Vietnam.  Yet, our generation would soon become witness to a new war- little did I know the impact that war would one day come to have on my life.

     When I began my collegiate career, I became more familiar with the military.  My roommate Heather's dad was then a member of the Army, and her brother had just been commissioned into the Navy.  I met military brats from all around the world.  I got to see ROTC cadets in uniforms weekly- I definitely did not complain about that!  But really, I grew a greater respect for the men and women that fight for our nation.

     For several months, my best friend Jamie tossed around the idea of joining the Marines.  On a brisk, fall day in November of 2008, Jamie informed me that he had made his decision.  Six months after graduating from high school, he had decided to enlist in the United States Marine Corps.  That same weekend, he got "WARRIOR" tattooed across his back- a symbol of his future career and his commitment to fight for the ones he loves.

     In January, Jamie officially enlisted, and he left for Parris Island, South Carolina, on Mother's Day.  After thirteen long weeks, lots of letters, and a few tears, I got to watch Jamie graduate from basic.  Seeing my best friend walk across the parade deck with his unit literally gave me chills.  He was not the shaggy-haired teenager he had been just a few months prior.  Jamie had transformed into a man, more than that, he had become a Marine.

     From the day he enlisted, we all knew he would someday deploy.  Well, that time has come.  This time two years ago, we were putting hundreds of miles on my new car- riding around Eufaula and talking.  Now, he is preparing to deploy to Afghanistan as part of ongoing Operation Enduring Freedom.

     I have a new-found respect for both military men and women.  They are no longer merely a person in a uniform.  I now see them as someone's husband, wife, father, mother, son, daughter, brother, sister, or best friend.  After all, it is my best friend that wears the uniform of a United States Marine.  Military families have to be the strongest group of people on this earth.  They too are part of the war.  Although they are not in the war zone, they are left at home to worry, pray, and support their loved one.

     The next eight months will not be easy.  Jamie is lucky.  He has more people than he knows who have already began praying for his safety.  His friends will be jealous of the amount of letters and care packages that he receives.  I will hang my yellow ribbon up, and it will not come down until my best friend's feet are on American soil again.  

     Today, say a little prayer for Jamie and all of those who are preparing to deploy with him and their families as well.  Pray for the men and women who are already in the Middle East.  Pray for the families of all of the military men and women that have paid the ultimate sacrifice in Operation Iraqi Freedom and Operation Enduring Freedom.  I love my best friend, and I can't wait for him to be home again!